


Finding Home

by christallic



Category: How to Get Away with Murder
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-21
Updated: 2016-03-21
Packaged: 2018-05-28 01:01:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6307780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/christallic/pseuds/christallic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After so much time they finally find a safe harbour in each other.</p>
<p>Or the one time where Michaela is totally in love with Laurel but tries to find reasons not to go for it. And Laurel is the one who goes after what she wants, keeps pushing until Michaela finally gives in.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Finding Home

**Author's Note:**

> I had to write this down because it was stuck in my head since the finale.  
> And I really love their dynamic, I hope they are not too much out of character :s
> 
> This is my first Laurel/Michaela fic and english is not my first language so don't be too critical :)
> 
> Song recs for this fic:  
> Melanie Martinez - Toxic : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZv7pmDCeeU  
> 3LAU - How You Love Me : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUR5aIxZCfI  
> Marina and the Diamonds - Savages : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxaTAFXgykU
> 
> Enjoy! c:

Michaela is looking inside her pockets to find her keys while feeling a pair of eyes watching her behind her back. Her hands are shaking as she tries to push one thought away.

_If she would've just stayed at home today, nothing of this would've happenend. Wishing this night would've turned out differently._

_Images of a dead body turning and shifting inside her head, burning into her memory. Again._

_As if she hadn't seen enough bodies already. As if not enough nightmares keep her awake at night. Leaving an aching pain inside of her chest. She stopped crying. Her eyes too dry to produce any more tears. When does it stop?_

_The irony ... after seeing so many bodies she can definitely say that she will never get used to it. It's not as difficult as in the beginning but still. People have died in front of her eyes, falling on the ground with bloody faces. That is not how Michaela pictured her life to go._

She feels metal underneath her fingertips, grabs her keys to open the door to her apartment. She struggles at first but finally gets the key into the lock. Takes a step inside and holds the door open for Laurel to come in. Laurel didn't want to spend the night alone at her apartment, so Michaela offered her to stay at her place tonight.

Michaela is confused by how calm Laurel seems, while her own thoughts are tripping. Her palms sweaty. But if Laurel can hold herself together, she should be able to do the same.

_They killed someone._

_Well, they didn't plan on doing it but that doesn't matter now. If they end up in jail, it's because there is a dead body. Everything covered in blood and they where there when it happenend. Annalise said everything is going to be okay. She sent them home, so here they are._

When she watches Laurel walking inside her apartment she remembers their clothes are soaked in blood. She closes the door behind her and turns around to face Laurel.

"Take your clothes off." she demands looking down at Laurel's shirt "And make sure not to touch anything."

"What?" Laurel turns around. She doesn't seem to be present.

"You are going to leave blood stains everywhere. I'll give you some of my clothes." she tries to explain but Laurel just stares back at her, with a confused look on her face.

"Don't worry, I won't look." Michaela jokes.

And Laurel seems to be back in reality. Her eyes move quickly to take in Michaela's graceful body until she pauses to look into her eyes.

"I wouldn't mind if you do." A smile dancing on her lips. Her eyes send out a warm feeling reaching Michaela on the other side of the room.

It feels awkwardly normal. Laurel flirting with her is a thing that apparently never changes and she is glad about it. A comfortable warmth spreads inside her chest. She shakes her head with a smile.

"Just take your clothes off, idiot." Michaela says teasingly and Laurel does as she's told.

Michaela turns around and moves to the fridge, surprised by the lightness Laurel shows off. A kitchen counter is the only thing that seperates the living room from the kitchen. She takes a water bottle out of the fridge and takes a sip. Behind her she can hear Laurel's movements. Her curiosity takes over, making her turn around. She sees Laurel unbottening her pants, when suddenly Laurel's head jumps up and their eyes meet. Out of shame she quickly turns around, her face red in embarrassment.

_She knows this is bad. Whatever is going on between them, it started a while ago. Nothing serious just flirtation. Light touches here and there, spending more time together than usual. It just happenend and it felt right. But Michaela won't take advantage out of this situation. She is not one of those people who can't stop thinking about sex but whenever she is around Laurel ... God, Laurel made her feel things she hasn't felt in a long time._

She listens to Laurel placing her clothes on the counter behind her. She puts down the bottle, takes a deep breath and turns around. Her head pointed at the floor, she is not able to look at Laurel right now. Her voice is slightly trembling when she starts to speak.

"I ... have to change." Michaela needs to get out of here. Her body is so tense it feels like it could explode any second. She feels Laurel's gaze on her, which isn't helping at all.

Michaela's legs start to move on their own towards her bedroom. She hears light footsteps behind her which make her stop moving, leaving her standing inside the doorframe. She turns around, focusing on Laurel's eyes, trying not to look anywhere else. 

"What are you doing?" Michaela asks confused.

"Following you?"

"Why?" Her mouth feels dry. She swallows hard.

"Do you want me to walk around in underwear?" A chuckle leaves her lips which sends a shiver down Michaela's back.

"You're right. I'm sorry. I'm a little ... " She rests her back at the inside of the doorframe while biting her bottom lip, trying to find the right words to say but Laurel is faster.

"It's okay."

She comes closer, places her left hand on Michaela's shoulder and gently lets it travel down her arm. The touch leaves Michaela feeling goosebumps under her sweater. Laurel moves her body as close to Michaela as she can to get past her. Casually brushing her hip against Michaela. Laurel stops right in front of her and turns her head so that their faces are just inches away from each other. Suddenly their eyes lock and Michaela forgets how to breathe. Her heart is beating so fast, it could actually break her ribs.

_Michaela is a thinker, she always was. But in Laurel's presence her thoughts keep wandering a little too far off. She can't even concentrate which happens more frequently than she likes to admit. Right now? Michaela can't believe how hard she has to try to think straight, while Laurel is in front of her. Half naked. Her body feels like it doesn't even belong to her anymore, it just reacts to Laurel. In ways that make denying her feelings practically impossible. But she still tries to shove them away and lock them up because Laurel deserves someone better. Who isn't broken._

Michaela pushes herself to look away. It was just a short moment but Michaela could swear it felt like eternity, trying to hold herself together. Taking a deep breath to keep her posture.

Laurel moves further into the room, tracing lines with her fingers gently on the bed sheets.

"I love how your apartment matches your personality." Laurel pauses teasingly "It's just as _clean_." She smiles to herself then sitting down on one side of the bed.

_The irony doesn't escape Michaela's mind. Her thoughts go crazy, there is nothing clean about it. At least not as clean as she wants them to be._

Michaela doesn't respond and moves over to her closet not looking at Laurel, giving her the satisfaction. She grabs a big shirt and shorts for Laurel, should be enough. She tosses them over to her and turns back around so that she doesn't have to look at her. Biting her bottom lip.

Michaela searches for something to wear and starts to undress herself. Feeling Laurel watching her every move behind her. She changes her pants into shorts without looking back, but the silence in the room leaves her feeling uncomfortable.

When she tries to take off her tight sweater something doesn't go right and she gets stuck.

_Shit._

She listens to Laurel getting up from the bed as she hears a soft voice speak.

"Wait. I got you."

She feels sudden pressure against her back. Laurel's bare legs behind her own. She closes her eyes to feel every touch more intense. She catches her breath and shivers when cold hands touch her skin, moving gently around her hips, up her stomach to remove the sweater. While pulling the sweater up Laurel brushes her fingertips softly against Michaela's bra careful not to apply too much pressure. She pulls the sweater over Michaela's head to the left side, letting her hand and the sweater slide down Michaela's arm. She makes sure that her hands never leave Michaela's skin when she drops the sweater on the ground beside them. Leaving her hand right on top of Michaela's. Placing her other hand on Michaela's right shoulder.

Laurel takes a step forward to close the space that's left between them. She keeps holding on to Michaela's hand when she rests her head against Michaela's, pointed down. Michaela can feel an uneven breath against her left shoulder. Pressure leaves her hand when Laurel traces a fine line with her fingertips up Michaela's arm. Before she knows what she's doing she can hear her own voice.

" _Laurel ..._ " she mutters underneath her breath, her eyes closed.

Laurel's hand stops on Michaela's left shoulder. She hesitates. Silence filling the room. Laurel pushes Michaela's hair onto the right side, exposing Michaela's neck. Her right hand travels down Michaela's back to rest on her hip, while placing gentle kisses on the back of her neck. She pulls down one bra strap to have better access to her skin. Michaela bites her lips to suppress a moan.

" _Michaela ..._ " between kisses she breathes against her skin.

_This is what Michaela wanted for so long and it feels unbelievably good. After everything that happenend she needs to let go for a few hours. But not like this. She shouldn't do this, not after what happenend between Asher and her. He is a good guy but in the end not what Michaela wanted. She broke his heart and now they barely even talk. Maybe she is going to break Laurel's heart. Maybe she gets her own broken. Maybe that is reason enough not to go for whatever this is._

" _I can't ..._ " her breath is uneven. Laurel stops kissing her neck.

She pulls her head back when Michaela slowly turns around both of her hands rest on Michaela's hips. Their eyes lock and Michaela can swear Laurel can see right through her. She knows that Michaela doesn't really want to stop. She tries to press her body closer but Michaela moves backwards until her back leans against the closet door. Laurel follows, pressing one leg between Michaela's legs. Their eyes focused on each other, Laurel can see desire in Michaela's eyes. She shortly bites her bottom lip. When she moves her head closer, Michaela tries to resist the urge to kiss her. Their lips just a breath away.

" _We shouldn't do this, Laurel._ " she swallows hard, trying not to look at Laurel's lips.

Laurel presses her hip against Michaela, she tilts her head slowly and starts to kiss Michaela's neck again. Michaela closes her eyes and lets out a long breath.

" _Laurel ..._ " she presses her lips together.

Laurel continues to place more kisses against her neck, sucking on her bare skin and moving up to Michaela's ear.

" _Why? Because we are both women?_ " she whispers into her ear.

"No. Because we are friends." Michaela shoots back in defence, her eyes open.

Laurel moves her head back to face Michaela, they are so close that Michaela can feel Laurel's warm breath against her skin. Keeping eye contact, she could make out a smile on Laurel's lips. Before she can interpret it she hears her soft voice.

" _Are we though?_ " teasingly she raises an eyebrow.

Michaela looks down at her lips, they're a little red. A smile still lingering on them. Her eyes travel, _lower_. She stops at her collarbone, _lower_. At her black lace bra, _lower_. The pale skin on her stomach, _lower_. Matching panties. Taking in every part of Laurel's body. Michaela can't believe how beautiful and sexy she is. Suddenly she hears a voice inside her head.

_Back off._

It's Laurel.

_She's mine._

_Wait until we see each other naked._

Michaela looks up again, but her eyes stop at Laurel's lips, she can't move past them. She wants to kiss these _rosy_ lips. Her desire grows. Then she loses control for a moment.

She lets her lips crash onto Laurel's. Her lips part in surprise. At first it's sloppy but not long and they get into it. The kiss gets intense when Laurel presses Michaela harder against the closet door. Moans can't be held back anymore, as Laurel's hands move up to cup Michaela's breasts. Michaela pulling Laurel closer by her neck. Letting her tongue explore Laurel's mouth, tasting the sweetness of her lips. They forget time, space, everything. 

Once they seperate to catch their breaths, heavy breathing is filling the room. Their lips red and swollen from kissing. After breathing in oxygen Michaela is able to put her thoughts in order. She licks her lips and places her hands on Laurel's shoulders. Her voice is soft and tender when she speaks, still out of breath.

" _Laurel, this is a bad idea. I think I ..._ " she stops when she sees Laurel's expression change.

_She sees something crack inside of her. She is broken. And after so much time pushing the pain away Michaela can see it clearly inside of her eyes. She is falling apart. She had never imagined to see Laurel like this. It breaks her heart, even though she is not sure what exactly they are._

_Does it matter? She clearly cares about her._

Suddenly she is pulled out of her thoughts by Laurel's voice, it's not more than a whisper. She is trembling, trying to find the right words to say.

" _Michaela please. Just for tonight ..._ " It sounds like a wish coming out of her mouth " _I need to forget ..._ " tears building up in the corner of her eyes.

Laurel's left hand finds its way to Michaela's face, brushing her thumb against her cheek.

" _I need this!_ " She pauses, figuring out what to say, ending up saying what she feels " _I need you!_ "

_After watching everything fall apart. Everything she touches get distroyed. Michaela can't help but think, it's her fault. Being cursed or something. Looking at the ruins of her life a pain running through her body. Leaving a giant hole that can't be fixed. She realizes she needs to forget, too. If she knows one thing for sure it's that Michaela needs Laurel as much as Laurel needs her._

_Just for tonight she allows herself to lose control and let go. For the sake of Laurel's safety she has to turn off her brain. They have been through so much, they can get through this together._

Michaela moves closer and rests her forehead on Laurel's, closing her eyes.

" _It's okay. For tonight._ "

Michaela pulls her back in, kissing her again. But this time it's nothing like the first. It's gentle and slow, you can feel the tenderness surrounding them. Michaela carefully places kisses on her lips trying to put the broken pieces back together.

It takes awhile for them to completely let go. At first it's gentle but after some time they move to the bed, doing everything that needs to be done to forget and accept the fact that there are only the two of them. Nothing else matters anymore.

_____

A sunray tickles Michaela's face, slowly waking up. She actually slept through the night for the first time in months. No nightmares, just peace. A smile growing on her face when she sees Laurel in her arms. She places a gentle kiss on her forehead, trying not to wake her up.

_She hopes that eventually she would be able to kiss Laurel and not worry about a single cursed thing in her life._

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and Kudos are very much appreciated! c:


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